Trash Run #804

22 Apr

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MIS-MANAGEMENT
COMMITTEE
HASH MASTER Mumtaz Amarali 625-3617 x29436 mumtaz98@hotmail.com
HASH ASSISTANT Pradeep Subrian 678-2372 psubrian@bluewaterstt.com
COMMUNICATIONS MINISTER Zameer Ali 678-9172 u4ria532@hotmail.com
FINANCE MINISTER Lorin Paton 622-5806 (O)
HARELINE Salma Khan 753-8843 salmakhan_10@hotmail.com
SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT MINISTER
Arthur Seebalack
461-5665
HEALTH MINISTER
Tiza Matura
683-4848
SPORT & YOUTH DEVELOPMENT MINISTER
Martin Griffith
681-9552
WORKS & TRANSPORT MINISTER
Ashe Holder
ARTS & CULTURE MINISTER
Janine Winston
FOREIGN AFFAIRS MINISTER
Colin Sorias
INDEPENDENT SENATOR
Betty Agostini
INDEPENDENT SENATOR
Diane Henderson
Website Address: http://poshhh.org
RUN DETAILS
RUN# DATE HARES SITE SCRIBE
804 Mar 31, 2012 Virgins Hares (The Undertakers) and the Hash Master Eccles Road, Mayaro Your Friendly Neighbourhood Hasher-man

Line Break - On-On Feet

Well yes! It’s been an embarrassingly long time since ah set foot in Mayaro-land. The promise of cheap draft beer was more than enough reason to make that trek halfway across the country. It was all the damn running through bush drama, that was daunting! Nevertheless, I shook off the workweek, bandaged up the wonky knee and made a beeline down to the beach house.

Thanks to a combination of the traffic gods sparing us the customary Valencia stretch traffic and my friend’s blatant disregard for the people dem speed limit, we made it down in great time. This all meant squat since the actual hash would be off to the usual late start, but it did give me ample time to maco the surroundings. A comfy, furnished upstairs/downstairs house with good facilities? Sand-filled back yard with volleyball net, coconut trees and inflatable pool? Extra fully enclosed tents (I doh like ting burrowing up under me while I sleeping) for anyone willing to rough it outside? A nicely stocked bar? A live DJ? Several sexy female hashers? Shucks man, why didn’t I make plans to spend the night after all? Steups!

The pre-hash meeting got underway with the all too common line about "it eh have no hills today" being thrown about from the get go. No one falls for that anymore! Ashe shook up the virgins a little more with the claim that "it’ll take 5 hours and we heading to Galeota Point". There was this one woman that genuinely looked horrified. Come to think about it, I didn’t really notice her on the trail. Who I DID notice however, was a certain Ms. Roopnarine of ah-tink-she-kinda-hot political fame. She got tangled in a vine at one point and I offered some assistance, but her friend gave me a look as if she wanted tuh ‘Jack’ me up! So I nodded and ran on. Guess somebody shoulda ‘Warner’ about how challenging it might be. (Yes, I go start ironing my court clothes from now)

For me, the course set was ideal. It was challenging without being scrotum splitting. Long enough to feel like you did something, but short enough to ensure the hares avoid a cussin’ when we got back. While light on the water features, we did get a few steep hills requiring some ‘all hands on deck’ action (I successfully managed to not grab every thorn and picker this time around). The numerous checks scattered throughout helped the semi-fit amongst us (me) to actually keep up with the main pack. I’m not a fan of the ‘marathon’ styled hashes. The old body ain’t what it used to be! A special note here: Someone should get an award for the most amount of paper used to make an ‘On In’ without actually saying the words ‘On In’. It was a like a giant speech bubble with an arrow-shaped coconut branch, pointing the way back to the house.

Under a setting sun, we bore witness to one of the most hilarious/confusing Down Downs ever. Allyuh look, forget the 1990 coup hearings ok? Someone need to call ah commission of inquiry into how the virgin that got stuck in the mud after giving us his best Usain Bolt impersonation, DIDN’T automatically get the poofter award! Instead, twelve candidates (with offences ranging from the untimely cutting of one’s own offspring’s ass to the untimely sweeping of one’s own girlfriend’s tent) were subjected to an impromptu game of musical chairs. Now, clench those butt cheeks real hard ’cause the following logic could make you shit yuh draws. Ultimately, only one person can be crowed king or queen of the poofters on the night, right? So why would anyone willingly run, wine and fight their way past eleven rounds of musical chairs only to be humiliated with that title? As in, if you didn’t wanna make a poofter, all you had to do was NOT make an attempt to play. Scratch yuh chin and think about that one for a moment…

Now some participants were good sports and entertained us till the end. Others caught on quickly, steupsed, got eliminated and made their way to the bar (the real winners in my book). All this should make us question Doon’s real intentions. Did he really want to be poofter that night? Maybe he didn’t understand what was going on? Or maybe he just enjoys the smooth, filtered taste of ah cold posie-beer? Lawd.

Sadly, since I had prior plans (that may or may not involve somebody’s girl child) I had to ‘hi-ho pancho’ up de road. No doubt, there would be some classic stories to be heard at the next hash event. Ah cyah wait! So it’s ON ON to the next one!

Line Break - On-On Feet

RUN DETAILS
RUN# DATE HARES SITE SCRIBE
804 Mar 31, 2012 Virgins Hares (The Undertakers) and the Hash Master Eccles Road, Mayaro Onlooker

I was personally drawn to visit Mayaro this Saturday evening having spent so much time in the area. An off-again, on-again hasher as myself would have done well re-visiting some old village hangouts, but Eccles Rd. was tonight’s hangout of choice.

Ahh…the hash run; an oddly misunderstood pastime, evoking responses to explanations as varied as the mis-adapted individual patrons it attracts. 28 years on and this is undoubtedly a very special gathering with its unique peculiarities. Oddly so, I am currently taken to thought as to the reasons for participating in the hash run – their reasons, and my reason. On this particular occasion, simplicity in response prevails – an excellent evening, well spent! An immaculate run-site, resplendent with sunshine. A run, erring on the short side (how short?…I’ll let the reader ask one of those “Front Running A-holes”, sorry, “Bastards”), through some challenging terrain. And an after hash party, coupled with Hash DJ, that would rival most. Definitely a miss for those that didn’t make it to Mayaro this evening.

The site was great by most standards; the run being advertised as a camp weekend, greeting he author on entry with lovely mini canvas fornicating compounds, disguised as tents. Though some hashers preferred to erect their own, the tents that is. Of significance was Ski’s tent, a real five-star outdoor accommodation by most standards, dwarfing the others around. I was tempted to walk up to the reception desk and enquire about staying the night. Unfortunately I wasn’t that prepared to overnight – a real mis-calculation on my part.

The author failed to identify any Masters of anything as part of the hare outfit – a ‘virgin dozen’ strong, with an average age of about 7years (excluding Ashe of course – no offence). I also failed to see any hares gathering the cadavers of expired hashers, but then again who’s me to question the meaning of “Undertakers”.

These quirks obviously did not hamper this virgin outfit (excluding Ashe of course – no offence). ‘A decent effort’, to quote an acknowledged ex-HM. A loop out of Eccles Rd., through a watermelon patch, across a tiny stream, crossing the road to gain access to some real bush, not one, but two steep hills, some mud, the kind that loves to consume hashers’ shoes, some bare exposed landscape, a 2k road run, and On-In looping back from the beach. Did I forget the 2k road run?

We had it all here, save for a river or two & maybe a little razor grass for good measure. A comely run tagged with a par score.

The down-downs took place with much fanfare – there being a dozen virgin hares to serenade, with a new virgin song! (thanks whatever your name was ex-HM). A dozen mis-demeanors, committed by a dozen mis-articulated hashers, some very worthy of their poofter nominations. A presentation of what looked like a Surinamese flag to the Iron Lady, from a globetrotting young hasher. Satisfied!..but more to come.

Now for a true & true hasher, the traditional one that is, it is difficult to critique a hash after party where the HM announces 4 free kegs of beer. I mean even judging by my transient status, that is hasher’ nirvana. Tongue & mood inhibition lubricant; in copious quantities. Tiza doing a version of the Rock Lobster; Sandi’s seductive dancing, depending on which side of the light you were standing; Victor contorting in a manner that tests his already fragile vertebrae; Wahid parading his freshly shaved back; a Central posse member performing some aerial acrobatics; Reed & Diane compassionate with individual bottles of rum in time with the DJ’s cue; two local Chippendales keeping the female hashers’ eye food topped up; Christine wondering how to get a keg of beer on the bus back to POS; some female hashers in prime position and ready for the night’s activities; the male hashers on the outskirts of the semi-circle, waiting patiently to pounce on the unsuspecting; the Iron Lady & her assistant quietly looking on.

The author did not stay longer to record any real mis-behavior. A ride away from this lovely hash-jam was my just reward for my mis-planning. I am sure I will get a whiff of any major mis-chief or mis-deeds and hoping the whistleblowers don’t provide a mis-count of the scenario.

All in all a great hash.

Line Break - On-On Feet

From the Office of the Iron Lady
(People who try to whittle you down are only trying to reduce you to their size)

Once upon a Mayaro Hash run 12 hares and a campout, a weekend of Sun, Sea, Sand and debauchery (plenty of beer, fun, more beer, a little shiggy, bake and shark, fish broth, beer, tents, air mattress, hash gear and a readiness to engage in anything, even dancing on the now created "Lap Dance Chair", a open mind and an appetite for fun and friendships (lots of bonding and un-bonding)oops did I mention beer? I must thank all for making this weekend a super one and also thank you Audrey Shim for suggesting we have a run and lime like this…..On On The Iron Lady.

Welcome to our virgins hope to see you again : Emma, David and Karen De Bastista, Karen Barker, Kiana and Karena Davis, Jimia and Dameia Coryat, Lee Vun Solomon, Sasha Martin, Christian Diestinger, Lisa Ossner, Erik Blair and Angela Francis

New Shoes: Dana (virgin)

Happy Birthday: Mark Lee Lum

Poofter: We had 12 nominees, starting with Curtis Harper who received the FFF t-shirt that day, to the birthday boy Mark, the new shoes girl Dana, Sheldon (National Security, who knows every nook and cranny in Trinidad and calling 10 times for directions, Lisa for beating Jordan (the youngest hare and poofter), Shawna, Reed, Doon, Morand, Bolt (shoes stuck in mud…good he went through an X) and many others, so we played musical chairs to determine who our poofter would be, but they didn’t know if it was the person who won the musical chairs would be poofter or the person who lost, it was fun seeing these big horses trot their stuff, the last 2 was Sheldon and Doon…Doon won the musical chairs and he was given poofter more so because of our he played musical chairs.

UPCOMING HASH EVENTS

Invaders Pan Lime
Date: Sunday 15th April , 2012
Venue: Panyard, Tragarete Road, opposite the Oval
Time: 6:30 p.m.

HASH TRAVEL 2012

GRENADA – THE INTER-CARIBBEAN HASH – APRIL 25 – 29, 2012

PANAMA – JUNE 6 – 10, 2012

Wednesday 6th June, 2012 (departure Trinidad 5.58 pm)
Return Monday 11th June, 2012 (departure from Panama 11.58 am)
(check taz (The Iron Lady for details)

Line Break - On-On Feet


Directions to the next run

Date: April 28, 2012
Time: 3:30p.m.
Hares: Boos
Run Site: Flanagin Town

Uriah Butler Highway heading to south to the Chaguanas exit ); go through Londonville (pass turnoff for Ravine Sable, continue through Caparo to Flanagin Town junction (14.5 km); at the junction (Bar Lee Tong’s will be on the right; the Health Center is on the opposite side of the street, make that left at the junction, direction Mamoral Road. Make a right at the very next corner, Telemaque Street (opposite the Brasso Police Station), drive to the top of the hill (follow HHH sign), make a left, go a short distance, find parking. You have arrived at the run site.

Please be advised that we recommend car pooling for environmental and safety reasons as well as the fact that there will be limited parking in the small street of the very small village. Traveling time from Pos: 1.5 hours

There will be food available for purchase.


2012 RECEDING HARELINE


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